Day 10: The Fringe all around us.

Shakespeare once wrote “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players”, and I think I notice this more during the Fringe than any other time of the year.

Walking around the Fringe festival grounds is like watching a thousand productions.

Some are short physical comedies like the volunteer I saw just today trying to decide if he wanted something from the hot-dog guy:

“Do I want a hot dog? No, no I shouldn’t have a hot dog”

*Walks away… stops… heads back to the hot dog cart*

Fin

Others have a message, and possible divine intervention:

*Car zooms up… then slows… window rolls down*

“THEATRE IS FOR FAGS! YOU’RE ALL FAGS!”

*Window rolls up…. zooms away at top speed…. into a tree*

Curtain

Some are real think pieces… that you overhear in the beer tent:

“One time when we were young, my brothers had a contest to see who could fit the most corn up their nose. I won”

“Oh my God! You were snorting corn? Are you still on the corn?”

“No I don’t do that anymore.”

“Are you sure, we could do a cob if you want.”

“I’m not snorting corn with you, that last batch you got was laced with peas.”

“Ya, I ended up getting corn jaw.”

The End

Sometimes it’s a play of misdirection.

“Have you seen anything good?”

“No.”

“Really? Wow! Nothing?”

“Nothing.”

“I would have thought that something you saw would be good.”

“Nope, haven’t seen anything.”

“Wait… you haven’t seen anything?”

“Ya… that’s what I’ve been telling you!”

*rimshot*

Then there is the family drama…

“Mom! I want to go see Rambo Kicks The Crap Out Of Some Terrorist Dudes – The Musical

“No Jimmy. That’s too violent for you, and you won’t understand the disco scene.”

“But Mom!”

“No! You are too young and it doesn’t get out until 12:45 am!”

“Please mom…. please…”

“Oh, alright. But make sure you take your epi-pen with you. You know that you’re allergic to seafood!”

Fade to black

And we can’t forget, the action play

*runs down the alley*

“DON’T CLOSE THE DOORS! DON’T CLOSE THE DOORS! I HAVE A TICKET! DON’T CLOSE THE DOORS”

*doors close*

“You %^#$&@”

*doors open*

“I was just kidding”

“I’m going to KILL you!”

Roll the credits.

Yup, it really seems that there are little plays being performed all around us and all you need to do is watch. But I don’t like this idea very much, because it means that I’m always working, and we have to turn over this “world” venue all of the time…

I think the next show has projection… gah!

20140721-200835.jpg

* Except for the Family Drama, which was changed, all of these actually happened…

About JBJ

John lives in an abandoned toolshed behind a fake rubber vomit warehouse in Winnipeg Manitoba Canada with a squirrel named Peanut Hoarder, where he steals an internet signal from the Kung Fu school next door. He is a little "off". View all posts by JBJ

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